I awaken into a dream
floating adrift on a barge woven from
time and my heartless soul,
weighed down by anchors of regret,
upon a sea of misery and confusion.
Two mountains rise before me,
not out of distance but out of the fabric of time
The one, powerful, wrathful, exquisite in her beauty.
She hurls her will and her rage like molten diamonds into the sea.
She rails against the existence forced upon her
with fire and lava and steam.
She expends herself until she cools,
her glassy surfaces, hard and sharp.
I explore her treacherous canyons
as her claws catch my clothing and shred my flesh.
Slick with blood, I fall into her
and find within a soft beating heart of pure light,
enshrouded in veins of crystalline filigree.
Her essence discovered, she casts me out,
hurling me back into the sea like skipping stone.
I hear her laugh but my mind’s eye sees her weep.
The other, a presence of peace, calls to me
and I float to her shore.
She reaches to me with green meadows
and absorbs my regrets with acceptance.
She teems with life, verdant, backed by clear blue skies
and the promise of happiness.
For days I explore her pleasant valleys and rise high upon her peaks
but discover cliffs and impasses and pitfalls,
as if to tell me, “Follow the correct path or perish”
I follow her path willingly and discover deep within her, her essence-
an eye clear and bright, but made from the sadness of the knowledge of eternity.
Her gaze fixed upon me, she shows me my soul and I wish to flee,
but I am transfixed.
She gives me the way to salvation but I do not take it.
I am not worthy.
She releases me with a sigh.
I return to the shore to find a tree has grown
in the valley where the mountains’ roots intertwine.
A tree, tall and straight with a million woven branches
that can be seen from all sides at once.
I lay down at the base of the tree
and sleep for a thousand days
and awaken to a fluttering of wings.
An owl with endless eyes alights near me.
“Who?” she whispers. “Who will be next?”
“Hush Owl,” I sigh. “Let me rest in peace.”